Tuesday was my next ob appointment. I packed my bags for the hospital, fully expecting to be back on the Mom Unit again–overnight-type stuff, my Bible, daytimer and some books to read. My camera, just in case.
I figured I could always request other things later. . .
The resident (once again) was someone I had never seen before. So not knowing what my chart says, I went ahead and gave her the quick summary of my pregnancy. She was telling me the standard, “You’ll keep taking procardia and stay on bedrest until week 36, and you’ll have another appointment in two weeks.” I was skeptical. I didn’t really think I would last two more weeks. I wanted to say ‘Why don’t you wait to tell me the plan until after you check my cervix?’ But instead I just listened and waited.
Then she checked: she said I was greater than 4 centimeters dilated, and she didn’t even want me to walk to the hospital (which was in the same building). She requested a wheelchair, and someone took me over. The receptionist gave me an appointment card for two weeks out. I wanted to give it back and say ‘I’ll see them on the Mom Unit,’ but I took it anyway. Sometime after Micah was born, I found that card and wondered if I should have cancelled that appointment since he came early.
So I was re-admitted–back to the Mom Unit–on Tuesday, June 3, at 32 weeks, 5 days. Somehow I knew the end was near.
My contractions continued, and at > 4cm, there was nothing else medically that could be done to stop Little Q from coming.
That afternoon, I called two of my dear friends, Donna and Stephanie. Both were bridesmaids in my wedding, and both delivered babies at 32 weeks.
Donna had experienced preterm premature rupture of membranes (PPROM) in the middle of the night, while her husband (a pilot) was out of town. She drove herself to the hospital at 2 a.m.!!! and fortunately the baby did not arrive until the next day. Her husband was able to be there for the birth. Her son Wesley was in the NICU for five weeks, and fortunately is a very healthy 6-year-old now! With her second pregnancy, she was on progesterone shots, but experienced preterm labor and almost delivered around 34 weeks. The meds and bedrest kept Stephen from arriving until exactly 37 weeks (to the day!).
I watched Donna go through two challenging pregnancies. I heard her testify of God’s amazing peace in her heart, after her water broke at 32 weeks, as she drove herself to the hospital. (Normally, she is not a calm person in circumstances like that. She tends to freak out! But God really truly gave her His peace.) I watched her go through her second pregnancy with Stephen. I sat in her hospital room as she experienced active labor at 34 weeks (once again her husband was out of town) and as she read the Psalms and prayed that God would help her “surrender” to having another preemie. And then, when in her heart she “surrendered,” God stopped her preterm labor, and sent her home again–on bedrest for another month. I watched her wrestle with her emotions. She felt so conflicted, fully prepared for another preemie, and now “re-surrendering” to the challenge of juggling bedrest while caring for a 3-year-old. Which is basically where I found myself now.
Donna specifically reminded me that I can be thankful to God for this time, because He knows me completely, loves me infinitely and designed this time, specifically to make me more like His Son! Those words really carried me through. I could see God changing my heart, just like He had changed Donna’s, and I wanted to submit to His plan for me each day! Whether that meant bedrest. In and out of the hospital for the next few weeks. Or a preemie coming later that day. . .
My other friend Stephanie went into preterm labor either 7 or 8 weeks early, and her labor progressed very rapidly but she ended up needing a c-section due to Little Kate’s position. She also had some problems with the placenta. . . I can’t remember all the details. When Tyler was born, she had similar problems. And again, another c-section.
Stephanie talked me through the whole c-section thing–a completely new experience for me. I remember her saying it was incredibly cold in the OR and afterwards in recovery.
Stephanie is such a calm, stable person, who also looks to the Lord in these times, so she’s another good friend to talk to when you’re looking at delivering a preemie.
Wow, God gave me some incredible friends, didn’t He?
It was genuinely helpful to talk to them, because it seemed very possible that I might be in their situation very soon. Between the conversations with Donna, Stephanie and the visit from the neonatologist, I felt ready.
Another blessing: Mara was healthy this week–no fever, and she was able to stay with Daniel’s family and our friends the Uttkes (whose son Corban is one of Mara’s best friends) most of the time. I was so encouraged to hear reports from Daniel’s family and Melissa, saying that Mara seemed happy and was doing great.
Sometimes I think bedrest was harder for Daniel and Mara than it was for Little Q and me.
