This post has been in my “drafts” for days now.
It’s obsolete, because tomorrow I will be 37 weeks pregnant–full-term! I guess I didn’t have a whole lot of motivation to post it, because my weekly ob appointments have become quite anticlimactic, even boring–and almost a joke between my close friends and me.
“Are you still a ‘loose one’?” they ask me. In fact, that was a text message I received today (you make me laugh, Melissa!)
Yes. I. Am. And I have been a “loose one” for almost two months now.
Despite having more contractions than I could attempt to calculate, all the medications, bedrest, and hospitalization seem to be doing the trick! I have to admit my lack of faith when the obs, perinatologist, and my insurance case managers were all talking about “shooting for 37 weeks.” I was skeptical! But here we are: with week 37 just around the corner.
Because we had 28+ inches of snow over the weekend, we couldn’t get the car down our street for my Monday morning appointment. We had to reschedule for Tuesday, because Wednesday we were forecast to receive another 12-20 inches of snow (we got 16 inches) . . . With that forecast in mind, my husband gave me very specific parameters for exactly when I am allowed to go into active labor. Ha ha!
Wednesday night, the night of the second big snowstorm, I had very very intense contractions along with severe diarrhea and nausea.
I guess it was providential that the roads were impassable, because I totally thought that might be “the” night! And with any other weather circumstance, I might have decided to go up to triage, just in case. But since I knew we absolutely could not make it to our hospital (and if we called an ambulance, I would be taken to a nearby hospital which was not my preference for several reasons), that was motivation enough to mentally ‘gut it out’ and think ‘there’s no way I can deliver tonight.’ We decided to increase the frequency of my procardia doses to 5 hours apart, instead of 6. (When I was hospitalized before Micah’s birth, this was one way they tried to hold off labor; my doses were every 4 hours the morning he was born. So we figured that was something small we could try from home to slow the contractions. Not that it worked with Micah!) Finally around 4:30 AM I was able to go to sleep. . . I am sooo ready to be done with these contractions!!!
Anyway, back to my appointment. As expected, Dr. C said I’m “between a one and a two,” the baby is still head-down (her kicking makes that obvious), and her station is -2. I asked about coming off bedrest and the meds early, since I am having so many contractions at night and really struggling to sleep at all (it feels like my body and the medications are fighting all the time and between the very-low blood pressure brought on by my meds, the lethargy from laying around for almost two months, and the lack of sleep while I fight contractions at night, I have very little energy at all),, but it was no great surprise to me that Dr. C insisted that I stay on everything until week 37. . . It was worth a shot. At this point, the baby will be okay whenever she comes (baring something unusual), and I’m sooo ready to stop fighting against my body’s contractions and just let myself go into labor.
We talked about going for a VBAC, and I asked what would prevent me from having one. He said, since I’ve delivered vaginally before, they know that my cervix is capable of delivering vaginally, so just the usual things would cause the doctors to recommend a c-section: if the baby were to change positions, if the baby’s heartrate would indicate distress during labor, if labor were to progress too slowly. . . and then he mentioned if I should have excruciating pain in my c-section incision area, that I should call right away and they would do a c-section immediately.
He told me that I’ll come off the meds and bedrest at the end of the week, and I’ll probably notice quite an increase in contraction activity. (Is that possible?) But he said that won’t necessarily indicate I’m in active labor. That said, he added, “I would like to see you wait to deliver until the first week of March, since that’s when you’re due, but my professional opinion is that you’re going to be delivering early.”
I had two thoughts: First, wow! a professional opinion! So far, every time I asked the doctor’s to speculate on when I might deliver they would say ‘everyone is different: for some, right away, for others–you could even go past your due date.’ Which, I realize, doctors don’t have a crystal ball to consult on when anyone will actual go into active labor! but I really appreciated his offering a “professional opinion” after looking at my particular situation!
Second, I was struck by his comment wishing I could hold off till March! Ha ha ha! It’s just amazing–unbelievable!–that we’re even having this conversation!
So yes, I’m 36 weeks pregnant! By the end of the week, I will come off bedrest, quit taking procardia every 6 hours, and by Monday, the progesterone should largely be out of my system.
I’m sure it’s wishful thinking, but I’m hoping for a Valentines Day baby! And if she can’t come quite that soon, I’m hoping for some time before 38 weeks!
Other preemie moms share this same sentiment during subsequent pregnancies: The conflict of how very exciting and yet how difficult the last trimester is, particularly with meds and bedrest (especially since we entirely missed out on most of the last trimester with the preemie pregnancies), and how we feel a twinge of guilt saying it, but admitting, “It was nice missing the last two months of pregnancy last time!”
That was nice. I don’t want to repeat the scenario. But that was nice.
For now, I am just thankful that we’ve made it this far. It really is incredible!
